The older you get, the harder it is to make friends? Four methods to regain socializing and expand your social circle!

Directed by Atta Hemwadee, the Thai movie "The 151st Friend" has the male lead saying that in a person's life, they can only remember 150 friends, and when they meet the 151st, an old friend will be forgotten. In reality, we know deep down that while we may remember, as we get older, the number of friends around us only decreases. And as we grow up, it seems harder to make new friends. Is it really inevitable to have fewer friends as we grow?

Points and lines of life = narrowing social circle

After the age of 30, you may have already been promoted to middle management in the workplace. To maintain your image, or to avoid being accused of favoritism when handling work, it's difficult to blend in with the younger generation of colleagues. Due to competition, you dare not confide in colleagues of the same generation, making it hard to establish a healthy and equal friendship at the company.

As for old friends from the past, because of differences in the pace of life or circles, or other reasons such as starting a family or being busy with work, there is no time and energy to maintain friendships. After entering the workforce, the values of friends may also change, eventually leading to a gradual distancing. In recent years, there's also the phenomenon of people emigrating; in fact, long-distance friendships are not inherently problematic, but when you need someone to talk to about your troubles, those far away may not be able to respond immediately.

Making new friends is not an easy task either. Adult life is monotonous, with long working hours and few activities; the world seems to consist only of points and lines, going back and forth between work and home every day. In this vicious cycle, the social circle only narrows, making it increasingly difficult to meet new friends.

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Four moves to help you make friends

As we grow up, we get used to handling everything on our own, learning to be independent, but forgetting that we also need someone to share our emotions, discuss problems, and spend time together. The feeling of mutual dependence between people, in addition to being obtained from a partner and family, friends are also an important part. Good friendships can also broaden our worldview, allowing our horizons and interests not to be limited to the echo chamber. So, how can we make friends?

1. Be the proactive one

I once saw a comment online that said relationships fade because "one doesn't ask, the other doesn't say; one doesn't back down, the other doesn't give in; one doesn't pursue, the other doesn't wait." In relationships, there inevitably has to be someone who is proactive. If you value a friend, then take the initiative to express your concern or invite them out more often. Friendship isn't about winning or losing; don't calculate who gives a little more. If a friend is too busy to meet up, don't take it personally, don't assume they don't value the friendship, just try again next time.

2. Enroll in interest classes or courses

The best social state for adults is a natural fit; your interests can reflect your personality to some extent, so by attending interest classes, you are likely to find like-minded people. There are a variety of courses available, such as yoga, wine tasting, coffee brewing, diving, pottery... It's just a matter of whether you're willing to take the first step. Remember, you don't have to wait until you have friends to join you; not daring to step out of your comfort zone will only keep you stagnant in an ever-shrinking social circle.

3. Meet friends of friends

Many people are afraid of "friend introducing friend" or participating in friend group gatherings, but in fact, your friends know your personality best and know who you'll get along with; and the people who can be friends with your good friend probably have similarities with you; so if a good friend invites you to a joint gathering, you shouldn't refuse out of fear of awkwardness. At the same time, you can also introduce your friends to your good friends, expanding the small circle of friends and diversifying the activities you can do together!

4. Social networking platforms

Social networking platforms are not necessarily for romantic relationships; there are many platforms designed specifically for people to "make friends." For example, CocoCoffee House is a social networking platform specifically for women, aiming to provide a safe environment for working women to build meaningful relationships and meet good sisters who can participate in activities and share interests with you. Friendship sometimes really starts with a cup of coffee. If you want to expand your social circle, you might want to download our app to learn more!

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